So the man gets home aroun 6:30 from work. Instead of doing gifts this year, I am planning a fabulous dinner. On the menu:
Cajun style salmon
Sauteed garlic asparagus
Herbed white rice
Dessert is Riesling baked pears.
I have not attempted any of these recipes before and may very well fail spectacularly BUT, I'm going to try to get my gourmet on. Think Julia Child thoughts.
Anyway, that's my plan for the day. So whether you're celebrating Valentine's day or Singles Appreciation Day, have a super duper happy awesome one!
...In picking my mood, I had completely forgotten "loved" was Ariel & Eric. WIN!
So apparently we're going to get a pretty big snow storm this weekend. I'm pretty okay with this. We haven't had a good blizzard/storm in years. The downside? It's supposed to start around 2 today and last until late tomorrow afternoon. 24 hours of snow. And I'm supposed to work until 11 tonight. This worries me because it might not be so bad when I go in, but 9 hours of snow later, when I want to go home may be unpleasant. Especially in my itty bitty Jetta. So luckily Yoshua works until 10, and I may just have him (and his Jeep) take me home and leave my car at work overnight. I'm actually hoping they call and tell me not to come in. They're already closing schools early and the snow hasn't even started yet. At this very moment, there's not a flake in sight, but some districts have already sent kids home. So I'm paranoid.
So I'm really crossing my fingers that I won't have to go in.
In other news, the dark brown never faded from my hair, and my natural light brown grew in and now I've got this awful skunk stripe thing going on and it's horrible and I have to wear it in a ponytail to disguise it. So I'm hoping to make a run to Target or Ulta before the snow hits and I'm finally going to make the commitment to permanent haircolor and go back a little lighter to a light golden brown so it's at least closer to my natural color. I am very excited about this, but I'm always excited about haircolor. :) I debated going blonde, because it's the only color I haven't done in (mostly)adult life. Last time I was blonde was when I was 13. Then I went red and loooooooved it. Stayed red for years. Kinda wanna go back. I miss being a redhead.
Anyway, Superbowl party at dad's on Sunday. Kinda excited. I don't have any investment in the Colts or Saints, and I'm pretty upset over the Tebow/Focus on the Family ad, but I love football and commercials and I will probably be a bad feminist and watch anyway.
So snow, bring it on! I want a repeat of the blizzard of 92! (School cancelled for a week, something like 5 ft of snow. I was too young to really remember but I do remember it was awesome.
Okay, with all the New Moon excitement starting up, I need to voice this complaint.
Stephenie Meyer was seriously lazy when writing that birthday scene.
Oh yeah, I said it. I'm sorry, but with how overprotective Edward is, and how smart the entire Cullen family is...I just don't really buy that no one thought, "Hey, maybe Jasper, who struggles with the blood thing more than anyone else, should go get nice and full before super clumsy, always falling or injuring herself Bella comes over." No one foresaw any problems here? I mean...there are other ways to get to the point of Jasper lunging for Bella but...come on. Seriously? In Midnight Sun Edward freaks out because Peter and Charlotte are coming and OMGTHEYMIGHTEATHER! AND he can hear Jasper thinking about killing the girl in the cafeteria. I find it highly unrealistic for Edward to not think, "Hey, Jasper should probably eat before my clumsy beloved arrives."
It's just made worse by the movie because of the contacts. EVERY OTHER CULLEN has pretty golden eyes, but there's Jasper with PITCH BLACK. Really? Twilight the movie implied that Jasper and Alice were out hunting before Bella came over for this exact reason. Ugh. I don't know why but this plot hole has always really annoyed me. Meh, it's just a book/movie but still...it could've been a smidge more thought out.
Aaaaanyway...so today is Halloween and I have...no grand plans! Woo. I'm hanging out with my mom and sister tonight. I may rifle through my closet to see if I can improvise a pseudo-costume, just for my own satisfaction. Halloween is my favorite holiday but it seems like every year by the time it comes around I'm too broke to really get a decent costume. Which sucks because if I had the money, I'd be Heidi Klum-ing it up! I LOVE Halloween.
Crochet projects are going well. I finished Karly's Divine Hat and her One Hour Scarf. Working on a scarf for Susan. Hope to have it done by the NY trip - Dec. 3rd - so I'm not worried there. Jess & Miranda want hats. Jess is a tomboy so I suggested a beanie and then she said she didn't want her bangs to get flattened. And Miranda wants a slouchy beret/tam dealie but...she already has a bunch. I'm not entirely sure I'll make them hats though. I don't really have enough yarn leftover from their projects to make a hat, but I don't want to go out and buy another full skein. Le sigh. I'll see how I feel when I finish Susan's scarf i suppose. I love the color combination I picked for her. It's my favorite out of all of them. Actually, just so we all match, I think I'll use whatever scraps I have to whip up my own one hour scarf for the NY trip. Hmm...this sounds promising...
So! I've been waiting until word got out to everyone to post this. I'm engaged! Woot!
(I love that my reaction is "woot")
It's super exciting and awesome, and all I want to do at any given moment is plan a wedding. Because I am le stereotype sometimes. Whatevz. Don't even care. I've been looking at dresses and venues so far. To be honest, those are kind of the only things I care about. Flowers? Meh. DJ? Whatever. The dress and the location. That's what's important to me.
But I feel like I keep going on and on about it to everyone so I'm trying to keep my excitement mostly to myself and try not to talk about it too much. Because I remember when Missy was planning and I just didn't really care too much about which photographer she chose or which shade of blue. So on the one hand, I totally understand what she was going through with the excitement, I also realize not everyone is as enthusiastic as I am.
So...in other news...I'm starting Christmas gifts already. I keep wandering over to etsy to find things for people. I've vowed to finish my mom's cookbook for her. Miranda likes quirky accessories. Um...don't know that I've worked out what to get anyone else. But I am totally having fun looking. :)
Winter is officially setting in and I am so bummed out about it. We barely got a fall. I've already worn my wool coat a few days. It's that weird in-between weather where it's kinda too cold for a sweatshirt but still too warm for a winter jacket. Lame. Soon the pretty, colorful leaves will fall off the trees and it will be a barren wasteland. :( I'm not a fan of winter.
But winter does mean my last Christmas vacation before I get a job and become a grown up. (For the record, this notion of "grown up" is entirely invented by children, I'm sure of it. I do not feel old enough to be engaged, much less married. I have friends who have children. I just do not feel old enough for these things.) And I am quite excited for an entire month off.
And now I'm off to browse more dresses and venues and photographers. I know it's 2 years away but I just want to plan it all noooooow! lol
I am so bad with updating. Meh. C'est la vie.
So I have an eye exam today at 4 which I am SO EXCITED ABOUT! OMG. I'm lucky enough to still be covered by my dad's vision insurance, but the catch is that once I turned 18 I could only get an exam every two years instead of every year. So, my last one was at 20 and now I have finally become eligible again for an eye axam and dear god am I excited to see again! Pathetic fact: For the past two weeks, I have been wearing old, old colored contacts (from when I was probably 18ish) which are way too weak, plus my glasses which are also too weak. When worn together driving is so much better. It's a little strong to wear around the house and whatnot, but walking around campus and driving, anything involving distance works out pretty well. I'm actually kind of embarrassed to admit that to the doctor though. I'm afraid he's going to look at me like I've got two heads or lecture me that I shouldn't combine prescriptions like that. But when I can only get an exam every 2 years and I can't refill my "current" prescription of contacts, I gotta get creative. Really, I was thinking of the safety of others and just being a good person, right? Eh, that's my story and I'm sticking to it.
Being in my last year of college, I've been having all kinds of panic attacks and OHGODOHGODIHAVETOGROWUP attacks. I've been in school for more than 75% of my life and the idea of not doing that anymore freaks me right the hell out. Grad school, although a nice thought, I've realized isn't very realistic. I just don't have the enthusiasm for it. You have to really want grad school. And to be honest, although the idea of no more school freak me out, at the same time I am so damn sick of school, and ready to just be done. So looks like after graduation I will be entering the job market...which is even scarier these days because no one is hiring anyone and I'm terrified I'll end up working at Borders for the rest of my life.
But then there's the thing. I keep going back to this, too. I already work for Borders. I've been a barista for two years now. I know the workings of the cafe pretty well. I don't think it would be difficult for me to get a job as Cafe Supervisor somewhere. And as much as I say, "I don't want to be at Borders forever" a Supervisor position would be a really good start. Eh, it's maybe not ideal. Ideal would be working for some hip, awesome newspaper or magazine. Or getting paid to blog. Actually my former supervisor, when she left for maternity leave, never came back. She started her own "business" I guess you'd call it. She runs two blogs/communities, about the handmade movement and quality artisan work. It's really cool and I'd love to ask her more about it.
Anyway, must be off now to get my eyes poked and prodded and read letters off a chart. Woo. (I don't know of anyone, ever, who has been this excited about a doctor's appointment.)
Also...the Dolphins won last night!!!! The fourth quarter was so exciting! I am so, so fickle. I was a Pennington fangirl all last season but in two games I have joined the Henne love. That was a great game, and I'm realky excited to see the Dolphins turn it around this season.
Also also...speaking of seasons. Where the heck did fall go? Fall is my season. The pretty leaves, the lovely warmish-coolish temperatures, the crisp air, the smell of wood fires. I've been wearing my winter coat lately. Wtf. No. I demand fall come back. I am not ready for winter. No fair. It's too cold. Every year around this time I proclaim that I'm moving south. I swear, one of these years I'm actually going to.
Aw, there is a kitty in my lap right now. Adorable, but making typing a little awkward.
So tonight on Travel Channel we were watching Donut Paradise, as any artery-clogging-food-addict does, and Josh said, "That's what you should do. Rent out one of the store fronts on Main St and open a cafe/donut shop." I respond, "But I know nothing about making donuts." (Side note: Yes, I am aware it is spelled "doughnut" but I am feeling lazy right now.) So he proceeds to take the can of dinner biscuits out of the fridge and uses a water bottle cap to poke holes in them. He throws them in some hot vegetable oil and when they're done rolls them in a cinnamon and sugar mix and omfg they were amazing. And so apparently donuts are really just that easy. And soooooo good. Especially all fresh and warm. And because they were from a biscuit mix they were all light and fluffy and not heavy like cake dougnuts. So...that happened, and now fresh donuts are added to my hypothetical future coffee shop.
So if you want a nice cinnamon sugar doughnut, but don't want to find a 24 hour Dunkin Donuts, grab some premade biscuits, cut the middles out and fry them just until they're brown. You will not regret it because they are amazing. I now want to experiment with making my own dough and mixing in like, mashed bananas for banana fritters. OMG, I think I have found my calling in life.
In other news, I've gotta come up with a 1 page advertisement for a product, real or imaginary, for Copy & Line Editing. We haven't gotten the specifics just yet but even with just the bare bones idea it's testing me. I took this class to improve my writing and my grammar...I'm not a Design major, I don't really do well with that kind of thing. But, maybe I can use this to design an ad for my awesome new coffe and doughnut shop! Oh yeah. I just made this fun. Awesome.
Meh. School is school. I keep trying to get ahead and do assignments way before they're due but it's tough because again my weekend is full. I work Saturday until 3 and then Light the Night is at 4:30. And after 7 hours on my feet and then another 4 either standing or walking around, I'm just not gonna be in the mood for homework. Plus then I open on Sunday at 8 again...inventory. And I'm there until 2, so I mean I guess I've got most of Sunday to work on stuff.
Meh, I gotta talk to le boss though. I asked for Wednesdays off because a friend and I are gonna do weekly GRE prep. I just picked a random day, but I put that request in and now this coming week I only have three shifts. I mean, I'm not currently complaining, but I hope it's not a permanent thing. I found out that one of the other girls is unavailable Wednesdays though, so I think when I'm in on Saturday I'll pop by le boss's office and explain the situation and tell her I can pick a different night if it's too much of a hassle. I gotta admit, I did totally like the idea of being able to watch Glee, but c'est la vie.
Omg Glee. It's my new favorite show. I have to watch it on my laptop, because I work Wednesdays, but it's kind of better because commercial breaks are only 30 seconds long. :) I. Love. It. And Kristin Chenoweth's going to be on next week. And Josh Groban was on last week. Hilarious and I looooove it. Yep. Just gushing about it. :) I just love the glee club/acapella versions of popular songs. Gold Digger was fun, Don't Stop Believing was awesome, Rehab was insane, but I think Take a Bow was my favorite so far. Anyway, everyone should watch Glee because it's amazing. And Matthew Morrison is dreamy. The end.
I'm sort of freaking out right now. May or may not be having a kind-of breakdown.
School is seriously stressing me out. I have a French test coming up on Monday and I just plain don't know it. I leave the classroom and nothing sticks. I mean, I have to give a lot of credit to the critical-age theory in Linguistics because when I was 13-14, just at the end of the "critical age," I walked through Spanish no problem. It all made sense and I was good at it. Maybe that was because that part of my brain was still capable of acquiring new language. But now I'm 22 and I can't for the life of me keep a hold on French. And you know, my expectations for myself aren't really that high. I need a C for it to count toward graduation and to be honest, that's all I'm even hoping for. Sure it'd be nice to get an A or a B, and yeah I'm gonna work my ass off for them, but I'm not exactly confident that I'll get them. Which I'm sure is just going to hinder me. You know, power of positive thinking and all that.
It's just that...There's reading every night for every class I have, homework or a paper due for three out of four every day or sometimes every other. And I'm going straight home from school, grabbing a quick dinner and heading out the door for work. And it's like, when am I supposed to get all this stuff done? Work is really what's adding to my stress levels. It's not that I hate my job or anything. I actually enjoy my job and the people I work with. It's just that you know, over the summer when I wanted damnnear full time hours I got two days a week, and now school's started and I'm there five or six. It's just not conducive to proper studying. So I think when I go in tonight I'm going to ask Daniella if maybe, just for a few weeks, I can have my hours cut. Just during the week. Maybe just two weeks or so of not working almost every weeknight will be helpful. Just cause, you know I'm up until one in the morning studying, waking up at 8 to get ready, classes all day, quick dinner and then back to work. It's just highly frustrating.
I honest to god broke down this morning and was just bawling into Josh's shoulder. It's like the quote from Igby Goes Down. This quote has always stuck with me because I always find myself stressing out over something. "You see it, Igby? I feel this great, great pressure coming down on me. It's constantly coming down on me. It's crushing me." And I hate to say it but that's how I've always felt about school. I'm the first-born, and my parents didn't get to go to college (although my dad did go back for his B.S. when I was a kid) so there's this tremendous pressure to succeed. And it's like every time they say, "Oh Jess, we know you can do it, you're so smart," for some messed up reason it doesn't encourage me or make me feel better. No. Instead all I get out of that is what a disappointment it'll be if I fail.
It really would help me to see a therapist I think. I just don't even really know how to begin that process. And then again, there's just one more chunk of time taken away for that then.
Ugh. What a terrible day. I'll probably feel better once the test is over and I get a feel for things but until then I can tell my stomach's going to be in a knot all weekend.
So Light the Night is coming up in...two weeks? And I only registered now. :( This makes me feel like kind of a bad granddaughter. I'm a little worried I'm not going to get any donations this late in the game. I set my goal low, at $100 but last year I only raised $95 and like, 25 of that was my own, and the rest was only after some serious badgering of my friends. (Oddly, the friends that donated were casual friends. The ones I've known since 4th grade couldn't spare $20.) Ugh. I know I shouldn't judge them for it. Josh and I had a whole conversation about that last year. Sometimes you really just can't spare the money. And they shouldn't feel obligated to donate money. But...I dunno. Older friends like Missy, who has known me since fourth grade and met my Pop Pop a couple times...I just...if she were walking for lung cancer I would donate to her. It really upset me last year that she and Justin couldn't spare $10 for my Walk.
But...such is life and I must accept it. So anyway, I'm not terribly optimistic but either way I'm excited for the Walk. Our theme this year is Ollie's Army, so we all got camo t-shirts and we stenciled that onto them. They even bought baby Cobby (Jacob) a little tiny camo shirt. It's the most adorable thing I've ever seen. (He's only 6 months old.)
Haven't crocheted in forever. We went on vaca and I haven't picked it up since. Well, no that's not really true. I have picked it up, but I can't quite get the hang of the heel. All the patterns for an afterthought heel say to decrease on the sides but I think I either started the ankle section too early or just have oddly shaped feet because the second I decrease I can't get the thing around my heel. So I suppose I'll just sc around for a few rounds and maybe then start the decreases. Meh, it just feels like while school's in session I almost shouldn't be doing it. Because it's so calming and addicting and I would happily corchet for a few hours and then all of a sudden it's midnight and I haven't done any homework and need to be in bed. So...yeah.
Speaking of school stuff, I really need to better organize myself. I need something like the agenda books they gave us in high school, to keep track of due dates and whatnot. Seeing how close or far apart my assignments are in calendar form will help keep me on track and not procrastinating so that I have three assignments due one Tuesday, and trying to do them all Monday night.
Which sort of segues into another issue. Josh and I had...I don't really wanna call it a fight, but it was a not so good conversation. Things are better now, even good now that we've worked it out...but I'm considering taking a week or so to just get away. Stay at my dad's or something. He suggested maybe we need some time apart to think about things. (I think he said this mostly because he does, because I've never needed to think about things.) At first I hated the idea and wanted nothing to do with it. But...I mean, admittedly, he's kind of a distraction. Some time away would probably do me good. I could actually focus on my schoolwork, and not just put it off for a few hours of couple time, as I am, unfortunately, known to do. So...I dunno. It may or may not happen. We may just take some time to be apart "emotionally" if that makes any sense. Probably not. But maybe after my dad's wedding, one week when I'm not scheduled to work too much, I'll go down and spend the week there. The drive to school will be a lot farther but...
Meh, I'm rambling now. I would probably do really well to have an actual paper diary/journal thing. Mostly I just need to get my thoughts out onto paper, most of the time. So...yeah. Gonna stop rambling now. Peace!
Back from vacation, back to school.
Virginia Beach was awesome. I mean, yeah I burned a bit and got some mosquito bites but it was just Josh and me and it was a nice relaxing way to end the summer. Sad to be back. I was fortunate enough that my burn faded nicely into a tan. Josh...not so much. His shoulders are peeling now, but at least he can lift his arms above his head. His was worse than mine because he was in the water most of the time and didn't reapply sunscreen as often as I did. But that's that. There's really not much to say about vaca. We camped in First Landing State Park and spent three of our four days on the beach.
School is back in session. I'm in the library right now actually. I have a three hour break between classes on Tuesday & Thursday. Now, later in the semester I can use this time to do assignments but today it's just like...yawn.
I should probably run over to the bookstore and buy a notebook, planner and my last few books but...first day lines are going to be iiiiinsaaaane. Already, just walking around the campus there are definitely more students than I've ever seen here. And Danita agreed. We've been here four years and we both think there are just way more people than there have been previously. So that's awesome. Parking will be wonderful. :/
Anyway, I'm really just kind of rambling because I'm bored so I suppose I shall be off to wander the internet & listen to the radio.
My friend Greg from work is doing a 24 hour straight radio show today so I'm listening to that. He's past the half-way mark now but I've only really heard music so far with a little bit of talk here and there. So it's seeming more like a stay awake challenge than figure out programming challenge. But then again, I've only been listening for about an hour so I'm sure he's gotta space all the interesting stuff out. Again, rambling.